NiallOK’s Blog

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A new blog from an anonymous Dubliner has been causing quite a stir as the author, known only as “me”, goes into detail about his sexual encounters and reveals his innermost thoughts about his girlfriend, who he simply refers to as “lover”, the Evening Herald reports today.

Psychotherapist, couples counsellor and relationship expert David Kavanagh (also known as the Date Doctor from dating site MaybeFriends.com) says that “this is not a healthy thing to do”, “it’s like writing a diary and having it read by everybody in the country.”

I’m not really sure if this is an echo of the awful bile that John Waters recently spouted, when he essentially said that there was no journalistic merit or value in blogs and that writing a blog was basically a waste of time - or if Mr. Kavanagh simply has a problem with the amount of intimate detail that the blogger goes into, but I’d have to disagree either way, because I wouldn’t call it “unhealthy”. I’d imagine it could be the very opposite, in fact - quite therapeutic. It’s not quite getting up on a soapbox and yelling the secret thoughts to the world - it’s a step down from that as there is the safety net of anonymity… but hell, what do I know, I’m no psychotherapist, myself…

There is certainly a case to be said for the therapeutic value of anonymously getting something off your chest in a very public way - take RTÉ 2fm DJ Rick O’Shea’s Text Secrets blog for example - plenty of people send in their secret and most innermost thoughts anonymously for all to see because, in some way, it helps them mentally, knowing that other people get to see them without knowing who they are. Sometimes, as well, it helps knowing that there’s other people in the same boat as you. Always, it provides interesting reading and good fodder for a radio show.

As regards the Dear Lover blog itself, while it makes for interesting reading, it’s just another outlet - another place to anonymously let out those feelings of yours that may otherwise be too embarrassing, revealing or possibly hurtful - a half-way step between the unhealthiness of bottling it up and the often terrifying step of telling the whole world… so yes, it serves a purpose, - a possibly therapeutic purpose - but, as blogs go - a very honed in and specific purpose too;- so while I’m impressed by it and think it’s a good idea, I’m skeptical about its potential lasting ability.