NiallOK’s Blog

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(We don’t really use miles or gallons here any more - all kilometres and litres… not that miles and gallons don’t make sense to us, of course…)

Found this interesting, in passing…

33.5 miles per gallon

My body is definitely in better shape than my car (or “that immovable lump outside my mechanic friend’s house” as I know it at the moment) right now, but I didn’t think it was THAT good… and I was truthful with my answers! (well, mostly - put myself down as a non-smoker with a moderate diet - I only gave up smoking recently, and I still enjoy the odd curry-chip…)

How many MPG does your body get?

Now, I’m off to watch Top Gear… Playing football and having a few beers while watching wrestling on telly later… what a manly day Monday is…

A father passing by his son’s bedroom, was astonished to see the bed was nicely made, and that everything was picked up and tidy. Then, he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow. It was addressed, ‘Dad.’

With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter, with trembling hands.

Dear Dad,

It is with great regret and sorrow that I’m writing to you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend, because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mam and yourself.

I’ve been finding real passion with Jacinta, and she is so nice, but I knew you would not approve of her, because of all her piercings’, tattoos, her tight Motorcycle clothes, and because she is so much older than I am. Oh, and she’s from Leitrim.

But it’s not only the passion, Dad. She’s pregnant. Jacinta said that we will be very happy. She has her own caravan in the woods, and a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.

Jacinta has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn’t really hurt anyone. We’ll be growing it for ourselves, and trading it with the the other people living with us in the commune, for all the speed, crack and E tabs we want.

In the meantime, we’ll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS, so Jacinta can get better. She sure deserves it!Don’t worry Dad, I’m 15, and I know how to take care of myself. Someday, I’m sure we’ll be back to visit, so you can get to know your many grandchildren.

Love, your son, Brian.

P.S. Dad, none of the above is true. I’m really over at Deco’s house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the Leaving Cert results sitting on the kitchen table.

Not long after the character he played was brutally killed off, while his (*ahem*… so-called) “religion” was belittled in a pivotal episode of “South Park“, Isaac Hayes, the voice of “Chef” and singer of the theme tune to Shaft, has died in Memphis at the age of 65.

I just noticed that this image appears on his official web site:

It’s a photo of Bernie Mac (who died on Saturday), Isaac himself (who died just about 8 hours ago) and Samuel L. Jackson (who is very much alive, as far as I know). It links to this page which reports that Hayes was due to play himself in an upcoming movie along with the other two.

This photo would be extra freaky, and the production itself clearly cursed beyond belief if Samuel L. Jackson were to die within the next day or so. Let’s hope, of course, that this doesn’t happen as surely there’s bound to be loads more motherf*cking deadly creatures for him to get off some motherf*cking modes of transport…

R.I.P. Isaac. Scientology and all that bollocks aside, you were still a soul legend.

And now for another excuse to have a picture of scantily clad females on the blog!

From Fox News comes the story that a study conducted by the Katholieke Universiteit Leuven in Belgium has shown that men influenced by sexy stimuli such as women in bikinis become more impulsive.

Well, duh!

The details of the study, published in the Journal of Consumer Research, show that men allowed to fondle t-shirts and bikinis (not on females at the time) placed more value on the present and less on the future. Researchers conclude that there is one common appetite system in the brain and when its stimulated, it wants to be rewarded.

Apparently though, this increased impulsiveness is not due to the common idea that men are more sexually distracted, - but it’s due to their arousal causing improved cognition and creativity.

Oh yes.